Just For Kicks.
If you had any experience of motorcycling, then you would be familiar with this kind of situatio: Last night I was driving my way back home,I saw a girl in a scooty and she looked fawsome from behind. So the curiosity had built up,after risking myself between the lorrys and buses and after overtaking her I peeked into the rear mirror with a great hope that she would be like Preeti Zinta in Pep Ad or Asin in the Fanta Ad. Howerver in reality the converse is always true, why should a girl like Zinta or Asin should drive a bike rather she would easily look for a boyfriend who owns a BMW. You can't get mindfucked anymore.Read along.
Even God would have shown you mercy, not your friend if you had went without a gift. I had to think on my present,my gift not to be something like a show piece; it should talk for itself , also it should be someway useful to the couples I had an idea of presenting a Kama sutra book or Dildos else some DVD collections of Sunny leone and Priya Rai .(if you hadn't known Sunny leone /Priya Rai, slap yourself and say don't act too much) . I had no qualms in presenting to them but it couldn't be more embarrassing when opening the gifts.
In Indian custom after the puberty function and marriage, the Gift opening ceremony is much celebrated in the family. First, People of all age groups sit in a circle and they open the gift one as if they. Imagine how would it be when the chottu of the family holding a dildo asking you "what is this toy,mama?"or your Grand ma holding the DVD of Priya Rai and asking for is that Sri Priya stothram??.
Honestly,I had no idea about what to gift till here.Har ek friend zarrori hotha hai ,friends are the greatest source of ideas,they can fetch you best ideas ever which Abishek Bachaan forgot in his idea campaigning. Prefer the dumbest person in the group for ideas because he would run naked for you to prove his awesomeness.
Note: They are no match for my awesomeness!
Note: They are no match for my awesomeness!
Foodu was also one of the main reasons that made me to the function, if it were a normal Tamizh Naatu marriage the food had to be sambar sadham /thayir sadham.,arey yaar idhu ko North Indian shadi hona??(This is slang is popularly know as Tahinglish= Tamil+Hindi+English) So, Tamil Nattu+ Gujrathi= double feast : D. I wonder why all the Mandapams have Dinning hall in the Ground floor and function hall in the second floor.( If you have the answer please leave it in the comment). It had been always deceiving that every time I walked straight into the dinning hall .Sometimes you could find some highly brilliant stranger thinking that they are guiding you ,talk to you craps.
Dumb Stranger : Thambi...this is dinning hall..ha ha ha
Me : Did I say you this is bed room? (in my mind)
*30 minutes later*
I entered into the dinning hall after all gift giving rituals.(this time I really came there to eat)
an another dumb ass :
Dumb stranger : The reception is upstairs.(smiles as if he had found sky is blue)
Me : (irritated) What the fuck?? Do I look like a hot chick?(in my mind)
While travelling in a public bus people tend to fight for seats and in the class room they fight for the last bench but here its funny to look because they stand even though there are lot of chairs.Observing them would be a best way to wail away the time.Anyone could find ladies with captivating jewelries and adulating each other.
Lady1 : Hey ,when did you get this necklace??*eyebrows raised*
Lady 2 : This is a new design I bought it from Malaysia costly, sixty five thousand ruppes,
by the way your sarree is very b'full and suits you well.
Lady1 : Awww Thank you so much!,this is Benaras pattu!
And the ladies depart happily.Now, the same situation,but different people.
To your attention age of all these respectable ladies are graciously over fifty five.Clearly, if you don't re complement the women who praises you, then take it for granted that you were left in the worst situation.Its worse than getting caught by the grand ma while jacking off.
For some technical reasons I had to end this post here.
PS: No special reasons for this post.(Sarcasm Intended)
*30 minutes later*
I entered into the dinning hall after all gift giving rituals.(this time I really came there to eat)
an another dumb ass :
Dumb stranger : The reception is upstairs.(smiles as if he had found sky is blue)
Me : (irritated) What the fuck?? Do I look like a hot chick?(in my mind)
While travelling in a public bus people tend to fight for seats and in the class room they fight for the last bench but here its funny to look because they stand even though there are lot of chairs.Observing them would be a best way to wail away the time.Anyone could find ladies with captivating jewelries and adulating each other.
Lady1 : Hey ,when did you get this necklace??*eyebrows raised*
Lady 2 : This is a new design I bought it from Malaysia costly, sixty five thousand ruppes,
by the way your sarree is very b'full and suits you well.
Lady1 : Awww Thank you so much!,this is Benaras pattu!
And the ladies depart happily.Now, the same situation,but different people.
Lady1 : Hey ,when did you buy this necklace??*eyebrows raised*
Lady2 : This is a new design I bought it Malaysia costs sixty five thousand..(lot of smiles)
Lady1 : ooo apadiya?? My grandma had the same necklace when she was sixteen.
Lady2 : *smiles shattered* Sari sari I think this is antique collection.(manages the situation)
To your attention age of all these respectable ladies are graciously over fifty five.Clearly, if you don't re complement the women who praises you, then take it for granted that you were left in the worst situation.Its worse than getting caught by the grand ma while jacking off.
For some technical reasons I had to end this post here.
PS: No special reasons for this post.(Sarcasm Intended)
